Messages of Hope
Real stories. Real hope.
Listen to the episode
‘I was yelling at the kids. I would just start raging, “You never do anything. It’s always left to me, blah, blah.” I’d just go on and on until I was exhausted. Then I felt absolutely awful because now I’m the worst mother in the world.’
Do you ever feel like your emotions are in charge of you rather than the other way around? Stella’s anger was scaring her children and she was stuck in a cycle of holding in the anger and then exploding.
Stella shares her story of what anger looked like for her and what she did to build a path toward managing her anger.
Key takeaways from this episode
- Repressed anger turns destructive: Stella grew up believing anger was wrong, leading her to bottle it up until it exploded in uncontrollable rage.
- A painful wake-up call: Hearing her frightened daughter say, “Mummy, stop shouting, I’m scared,” made Stella realise how her anger was affecting her family and motivated her to change.
- You can’t change what you won’t own: Real healing began when Stella acknowledged the impact of her behaviour and took responsibility for it.
- Anger must be managed, not controlled: Trying to control anger means denying it; managing it means recognising it, understanding it, and choosing a healthy response.
- “Sideways anger” is still anger: Suppressed feelings leak out through silence, sarcasm, or slamming doors — all signs that deeper hurt needs attention.
- Compassion breaks the cycle: Instead of hating herself for her reactions, Stella learned to respond with self-understanding and patience.
- Faith brought forgiveness and peace: Through her relationship with Christ, Stella discovered unconditional love and forgiveness — learning to stop punishing herself and accept that God still loves her, even when she fails.
Episode transcript
Click to view PDF transcript
Related booklet
Learn productive ways to express your anger, what to say, and how to say it – and what to do when your best efforts at good communication fail.
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